God looks at the heart.... Why can't I????

^7 But the Lord said to Samuel, “.....The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”  (1 Sa 16:7., NIV)

So this is a lesson I really thought I had down, I honestly thought I did.  I have friends that have tattoos, family members, one of my best friends has them; so theoretically I thought I had this down:  Don't judge by the body art.  Then this morning happened.

I went on my morning run, got my 3.5 miles in and I was in "cool down mode" or walking for 5 minutes.  I had my ear buds in listening to music and catching my breath.  A guy says to me, "Looks like you had a good run".  I looked at him (he is covered in tattoos, quite evil looking ones and he looks really rough), said "yes sir I did" and kept walking.  Then this voice in the back of my head says, "I cannot believe you just did that".

As much as it pains me to admit it, I blew him off.  I completely judged him based on appearance.  I felt awful about it, and still do.  The voice (obviously God), stopped me in my tracks, and I turned around and went back.  The guy was still there, struggling to walk with a cane. 

From this point I am so thankful I went back.  I'm not going to mention His real name, but we will just call him "Jeremy".  Jeremy had been in a motorcycle accident about 4 years ago, in which he admitted to going too fast on a curvy road.  He came around a sharp curve to find a parked school bus.  He in no way wanted to injure kids so he downed the bike and got pinned beneath the motorcycle underneath the bus.  Since then he has had 7 surgeries on his leg/ankle and is now looking at the possibility of having it amputated.  Jeremy shared with me how this accident changed his life and helped him to see that he needed God in his life.  He also shared with me how he had been sober now for 4 years.  I shook his hand and congratulated him for sobriety, and shared with him that I had now been sober since 1999 (oops bad memory, was actually 1997).  We continued to talk about life, God, and motorcycles.  He has 5 children (4 boys and one baby girl).  He is really struggling with the decision on amputating his foot or not.  God has given him a new life, a new insight, and a new hope on his personal journey.  He has twins (boy I know that feeling) that are 14.  He shared with me that periodically you can still find nice people around that Asheville area to talk to, but that most wouldn't take time to talk to him because of His tattoos and appearance because he has lived a pretty rough life (ouch, that hurt when he said that).

Jeremy and his family are quite active in local church in Candler (actually a church not far from my home, but I'm not mentioning the name), and one of his twins that is 14 feels that God is calling him to be a preacher.  Towards the end of our conversation I revealed to him that I was a youth pastor and gave him my card and number, expressed to him that if he ever needed encouragement (he was really struggling with keeping physical therapy and walking up), someone to pray with, or talk to that all he had to do was call.  I prayed with him and left.

I left knowing that I still have room to grow in seeing people the way God does.  Jeremy, I am so sorry that I didn't initially see the real you, but I am thankful for the grace of God that led me back to talk to you.  I am desperately wanting to see people the way God sees them, I don't EVER want this to happen again.  If I had not gone back I would have missed meeting Jeremy and hearing his journey.

God bless you Jeremy, and everyone else who has been judged based upon their appearance....

Chris

June 10 update:

I saw Jeremy this morning, he was still in pretty bad shape and discouraged.  He was out of options with his foot/ankle now and they are probably going to amputate it.  I spoke with him for a few and assured him that we would be praying for him on a daily basis.  So, if you would pray for Jeremy.

Depression

Depression, due to the untimely death of actor/comedian Robin Williams, people are talking about it (kind of like when Reggie White died people starting talking about sleep disorders).  What is depression?  Well, unfortunately, most people say that everyone feels "down" or "blue" periodically and that they need to just "think positive thoughts" and move forward.  It's not that easy, people battling chronic depression wake up everyday thinking and wishing it WAS that easy.  Most people that think that it is that easy are just simply not informed or educated enough on "Clinical Depression".  Clinical depression is very real, very scary to those who have to live with it, and to live with clinical depression is just downright exhausting.

So first of all let's educate ourselves, the following is taken directly from the Mayo Clinic website:

What does the term "clinical depression" mean?

Answers from Daniel K. Hall-Flavin, M.D.

Depression ranges in seriousness from mild, temporary episodes of sadness to severe, persistent depression. Clinical depression is the more severe form of depression, also known as major depression or major depressive disorder. It isn't the same as depression caused by a loss, such as the death of a loved one, or a medical condition, such as a thyroid disorder.
To be diagnosed with clinical depression, you must meet the symptom criteria for major depressive disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), published by the American Psychiatric Association. This manual is used by mental health providers to diagnose mental conditions and by insurance companies to reimburse for treatment.
For clinical depression, you must have five or more of the following symptoms over a two-week period, most of the day, nearly every day. At least one of the symptoms must be either a depressed mood or a loss of interest or pleasure. Signs and symptoms may include:

• Depressed mood, such as feeling sad, empty or tearful (in children and teens, depressed mood can appear as constant irritability)
• Significantly reduced interest or feeling no pleasure in all or most activities
• Significant weight loss when not dieting, weight gain, or decrease or increase in appetite (in children, failure to gain weight as expected)
• Insomnia or increased desire to sleep
• Either restlessness or slowed behavior that can be observed by others
• Fatigue or loss of energy
• Feelings of worthlessness, or excessive or inappropriate guilt
• Trouble making decisions, or trouble thinking or concentrating
• Recurrent thoughts of death or suicide, or a suicide attempt

Your symptoms must be severe enough to cause noticeable problems in relationships with others or in day-to-day activities, such as work, school or social activities. Symptoms may be based on your own feelings or on the observations of someone else.
Clinical depression can affect people of any age, including children. However, clinical depression symptoms, even if severe, usually improve with psychological counseling, antidepressant medications or a combination of the two. (http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/expert-answers/clinical-depression/faq-20057770)

Unfortunately many teachers/leaders in Christianity, view this disorder as one that should not happen to a believer in Christ.  I have heard it said, and taught, by some that if a believer's relationship is not right with Christ, or if they have "sin" in their life then that is what causes their "depression". 

Jesus addresses such a thought process in John 9:

As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. ^2 His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”  ^3 “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. ( Jn 9:1-3., NIV)

 

Sometimes things just happen in our lives that there is no explanation, rhyme, or reason as to why.  Depression is an illness just like any other.  This person mentioned in John 9 was dealing with blindness, the disciples wanted to know was it because of his sin or his parents that he was blind.  Jesus responded by saying "neither", sometimes things happened in God's providence so that His work might be displayed in our life.  Depression is NOT because of sin in your life, my life, or parents lives.  It just happens.  It happens so the work of God might be displayed in their life.  If a person battling depression can get out of bed and face the world, it is a miracle of God working in their life.  Sometimes just doing the simplest of things is a battle for them.

 

For the person battling clinical depression they face a battle that most people don't have a clue or understand.  The Bible tells us that our battle is not against flesh and blood, but its against powers of darkness (Ephesians 6:12).  The person battling depression faces that battle in their own mind, and it is exhausting.  They know a mental, physical, and spiritual exhaustion that most will never understand.

 

Only a person with clinical depression can understand the battle that some face on a daily basis.

 

If someone around you doesn't seem "right", if they fall under some of the above symptoms, I beg of you please encourage them to get help.  (This is one of those times as well that you don't need to say "I know how you feel", especially if you don't.) 

 

Here is how you can help with some do's and don'ts:

1. please please please don't tell them when life gives you lemons make lemonade
2. please don't tell them suck it up buttercup
3. please don't tell them if they prayed more, read their bible more, loved God more this wouldn't have happened (though they may need to do these, sin in their life is not the problem)
4. please don't try to give them quick fix answers, like "focus on the good" enjoy the sunshine, etc.
5. please do ensure them you are praying for them
6. please do remind them of how great they are
7. please listen...... don't talk just listen
8. please do not try to handle something as sensitive as depression with quick witted answers and advice, that is the doctors job
9. please listen.....don't talk just listen
10. please listen....don't talk just listen

For those of you reading this that battle depression, I pray for you and that you will stay strong in the battle...

Chris

Summer 2014

To my readers:  yes, I know it has been a long, long, long, long, long, long time since I have blogged.  Today I shall fill you in on my summer.

I Ran two races, one in June with this guy:

Me and my pastor/friend Ken Sausedo (love this guy isn't he awesome!)

 

and one in July (with 7000 others)

 

 

Cassidy, me, Bethaney, Color Run

 

neither one of the races was a personal best for me, but had fun!!

 

beginning of July took a group of students to Garden City, SC.

 

We had an absolutely amazing week as we spent the week studying, "I AM", the "I AM" statements of Jesus in the book of John.  Then we discussed who Jesus was to us.

Spending a week with students on a retreat is always a blessing, it is fantastic to watch them grow spiritually, grow as a group, and make new lasting friendships.

I also took on a new camp.  God laid it on my heart earlier this year to take our youth and students to camp at the same time, this was a tremendous undertaking.  This week would never have happened without out the dedicated efforts of some great leaders, who where flexible and willing to step up when I needed them to.  With our students we spend the week talking about our purpose, and with our kids we spent the week talking about choices and how they affect us.  Our students spent three days on the mission field in Murphy doing landscaping and clean up.  They ministered to a sweet lady named Marilyn by cleaning up her yard and spending time with her.

 

Student Impact 2014

 

Kids Camp 2014



There was much, much more that I was involved in this summer, but these are just the hi-lights.  Now it's time to get kids prepared for school, and get ready to kick AWANA into high gear...

 

blessings to you, and hope you have had a wonderful summer

 

Chris

not everything is as it seems

Tell me has this happened to you:  You make a mistake, you do the wrong thing, you say the wrong thing and it's eating you up inside.  You feel terrible, you feel guilty, and you just can't get away from thinking about it.  Then someone walks up to you, maybe even your best friend, and asks, "hey, are you OK?"  Without hesitation we answer, "I'm fine"...... and yet we know on the inside we are not.

We are so afraid to let people in, or at least I know I am.  We are afraid to let people know we don't have it as "together" as they think we do.  We don't want people to know that on the inside we are a mess.  We don't want people to know that we have fallen flat on our face with a mistake.  We don't want to let people down.  We don't want people to know that we are struggling with ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

We are such liars.

Maybe is simpler to smile, maybe it's more convenient, or maybe its just easier than trying to explain how you really feel.  Or maybe our deepest fears are true, that the person you tell is that shallow and will judge you by your mistake, or maybe they will tell someone, or maybe even tell the world through social media.

Or maybe they won't.

Maybe, just maybe, they do generally care about you and will simply just listen.

^6 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. (Jas 5:16., NIV)

Confess your sins to each other.  I find this concept very intriguing.  The many times that someone has asked me "how you doing" and I come so close to letting the flood gates out and tell them how I really feel, or how I'm really doing, and yet the actual words that come out are:  "I'm fine, you?".  I begin to scream to myself "YOUR NOT FINE YOU IDIOT.... you could really use a friend, some prayer, someone to listen"......

What would it be like to share your deepest anxiety, your deepest shame, or your deepest wound, and to have someone say, "Oh, I'm so very sorry, how about I pray for you... right now", and for them to pray for you then walk away and you be rested assured that they haven't judged you, they are not disappointed in you, and you now know they genuinely care.

So the next time you ask someone how they are, remember the answer may not really be as it seems.

Here is the thing, if you and I are going to tell they truth then we need to be able to receive the truth in love.  Don't act shocked, don't judge them, and keep your mouth shut.  They need to trust you.  I need to trust you.

I am going to try to do better on not putting on a fake smile, but I know its going to be hard....

Chris

self-doubt

Do any of you struggle with self-doubt?  I do.  I have never been the person that has been very confident in themselves.  I battle this on a day to day basis.

I started running for several reasons.  One was for my health, another was to burn off stress, and also to build my self-esteem.  In running I feel like I can accomplish something.  In running I have set some goals that I have been able to obtain, and It had been boosting my self-confidence.  Then, Saturday happened.  Saturday was race day. 

I have only ran a couple of 5k's since I began running.  The first one was November last year (2013), then I ran one March of this year.  In March I didn't truly run the entire thing, for several factors which are irrelevant at this time, so truth be known I have only actually ran 1 race.  So, I have been training since last November's Race to try to reduce my 3 mile run time.  I finally made it down to 3 miles in less than 30 minutes several weeks ago.  I have been able to stay close to that (ranging between 10 - 11 minute miles) pretty consistently.  Then something happened the week of the race.

I normally run 2-3 times a week between 3 to 4 miles.  I decided to only run one time last week in preparation for Saturday's race, I ran Wednesday.  It was not a good run.  My average mile was over 12 minute miles, and I barely got 3 miles in.  I had no energy.  So I brushed it off because my allergies had been bothering me and focused on doing better race day.

Saturday came and that morning I felt pretty good, was excited to see how this race was going to go.  I really felt like I could potentially run a very good race.  Walked a little bit (habit I do to warm up before running), turned my tunes on, and I was ready to go.  Race started and was running with some people and felt like I had a comfortable pace.  Mile 1, came and went phone buzzed and told me I was running a 10.34 mile, felt pretty good about that.  Then almost immediately after Mile 1, I could feel my pace slowing dramatically.  I began to coach myself to try and pick up the pace.  Mile 2, phone buzzed and said my pace was 11.32 mile, ok I tell myself that's respectable.  Then I hit a wall.  Not literally but runners know what I mean.  All of a sudden I felt like I could not take one more single stride, that was it, I was done.  I said to myself "I can't do this" and I began to walk.  So ended my hopes of a "good run".  Mile 3 was 13.30 mile.  I crossed the finish line at 38 minutes, and I don't think I have ever felt so disappointed in my life.

In Matthew 14 the disciples where on a boat in the middle of the sea, when Jesus approached the boat walking on the water Peter calls out to Him, "Lord if it is you call me out to you".  Jesus does, and Peter steps out of the boat, and begins to walk on the water to Jesus.  This would have to be an amazing scene.  Peter was able to do this for two reasons, one Is He absolutely believed in Jesus, and secondly Peter believed in Himself.  As he is walking across the water the wind picked up and waves rose, Peter hesitates and begins to sink.  Peter ran into his own wall, said to Himself "I Can't do this", he was done, and he was definitely the most disappointed he had ever been in His life to this point.  Jesus reaches out to him and says:

“You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” (Mt 14:31., NIV).

Peter sank in self despair because he doubted.  He lost his self-confidence.

I intentionally left part of my race out, but here it is:  As I approached the home stretch feeling down, disheartened, and disappointed.  There they where:  Brandy, Olivia, Rebekah, Samantha, and Pastor Ken cheering me on.  Energy came and I was able to at least jog the last little bit.

Point being:  All the training in the world can't help self confidence, but having a good cheering section can.

Surround yourself with people that will help cheer you to victory in this life.  I want you to know that God is your biggest cheerleader.  He believes in you.

End note:  Today I decided to re-run the same route and was determined to run it faster.  I did.  Today's run was my "confidence booster".

If Peter had the opportunity to Re-run the walking on water, I believe He could have.

Have a great day,  Chris.

Choices < ? >

"Don't let your choices define who you are, let who you are define your choices"

I woke up thinking about this today.  I don't know if I have read this somewhere, or if it an original thought.  I googled it and haven't found who I could give credit to, so I guess I will claim it.

Here is what happens:  we make a bad decision and we then think we are a bad person.

A bad decision does not define you and I as bad people, even a string of bad decisions does not define who you are.  A bad decision, or even many bad decisions, happen because we DON'T know who we are.  When we don't know who we are then we fall into the trap of trying to be someone we are NOT.

For instance:  a drug addict was not created to be a drug addict, they didn't know who they where so their choices dictated their life and their choices became who they are: a drug addict.

You need to know who you are.  It's imperative you know who you are, who created you, and for what purpose He created you.

Genesis 1:26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness

Psalm 139:14 I will praise you; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made

Isaiah 43:7 Even every one that is called by my name: for I have created him

Ephesians 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to good works

 

Every single one of us where created in His image, we where fearfully and wonderfully made by Him, and we are his workmanship (craftsmanship) created to fulfill a purpose. 

 

No choice we make changes that definition of who I am.  Can I make bad decisions?  absolutely  Will I make bad decisions?  absolutely  Does that change who I am?  absolutely NOT.

 

Now this in no way gives us a "pass" on making bad decisions.  What happens is the more we discover who we are, the more we discover the purpose in which we where created, and the more we choose to fall in love with the One who created us the less likely we are to make unwise choices.

 

In the same way this should change our view of people.  For instance, going back to the drug addict, when we look at them we shouldn't see a drug addict.  Then what should we see?  We should see someone created in the image of God, who is fearfully and wonderfully made by Him, and is His workmanship created to fulfill a purpose, that has either forgotten their purpose or never knew it.

 

So whether you have made one bad choice or a string of them, your choices are not who you are.  You are a child of God that made a wrong choice, so do not let that choice define you.

 

 

Chris

Teachable

Be Teachable.  I say that a lot, I think it a lot, and I teach it a lot.

I was reading this morning and began to wonder to myself:  "Am I teachable?"

Webster's Dictionary defines "teachable" as:  capable of being taught.

^11 Teach me your way, O Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.  (Ps 86:11., NIV)

According to this verse if I am teachable then I will be doing the following:

1. Walking in your truth.  Walking means living my life.  So I have to ask myself:  Am I living my life according to God's truth.  Does the Spoken Word of God dictate and guide my thoughts, motives, feelings, actions, and words.  I would love with everything within me to answer yes, but if I did I would be lying to God, myself, and you.  So I am 0-1.
2. Having an undivided heart.  An undivided heart is one that loves God without limits, never doubts, and is completely devoted to the one that created them.  I love God, but do I love Him like He loves me.  He loves me unconditionally.  I can't say the same.  I would love to say that I never doubt.  I know God believes in me, and I believe in Him.  My problem is believing in myself, and since He believes in me and I don't believe in myself.... I doubt.  Alright, well then, how about completely devoted to the one that created me.  I wished.  I have moments in time where I feel I am completely devoted, but as for all the time.... nope.  Great I am 0-2
3. Fear His name.  To fear His name is to give God the honor, respect, and reverence He deserves.  Honestly I know I don't always give God the honor, respect, and reverence He deserves.  He deserves that all the time.  Now I am 0-3.

Epic fail

Good news:  I am not alone and neither are you.

When David wrote this psalm it was a prayer.  Being teachable is not a one-time thing.  Being teachable is a process.  When David penned this prayer, it is what he wanted.  David, a man who God said was a man after His own heart, was struggling with being teachable.  It's about a motive, it's about an attitude.

Being teachable means that you and I realize we don't know it all.  We need help.  Be open.  Be willing to learn.  Learn something everyday.  God has so much to teach us.

so:  be teachable, learn something today, about Him.

Chris